I’ve been doing some soul searching recently, I’ve realised certain things aren’t making me as happy as I would like them to and the balance in my life is very much off. When I started this blog it was because I enjoyed sharing things I had achieved with you lovely people, but somewhere along the way, right around when I started to think about trying to make a little living from what I am doing, I got a bit lost and the love diminished. I feel the essence of what I enjoy doing is missing from much of my writing, I check myself far too much now, worried more about what will be popular, ignoring what is coming from my heart.
It’s very easy to get caught up in Social Media, you start caring too much about stats and numbers of followers, it becomes a popularity thing rather than an honest outlet, a place to share some happy thoughts and pictures. It shouldn’t really matter that I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, they may not get me and that’s ok, they don’t have to, it happens a fair bit in real life, always have, so why would this be any different?
Alice in Scandiland has given me some lovely opportunities, I get to chat with likeminded people, interact with some great brands, who I admire very much, but I need to get back to my roots, to what makes me proud.
This .com shit ain’t working for me.
I thought the transition over to self hosted, to becoming more official would make me happy, a step forward towards bigger and better things, but what I have found is I feel far less attached, there are several factors getting in the way and I spend less time here as a result. Maybe this isn’t something I need/ want to push as a business, I thought it was, but in reality the constant need to be online is making me sick. It rules my life, I religiously check my phone for notifications, I feel obliged to keep things flowing, up-to-date, current and it can become a chore, which isn’t what it should be about. The time that could be spent being creative is wasted trawling Facebook instead, something needs to change.
I may go back to my old WordPress page and get back to basics, I haven’t decided yet. We are moving out of the house this weekend, in order to have the new wood floor fitted throughout the downstairs (big YAY!), this seems like the perfect chance to take a holiday from Social Media, to figure out what actually makes me happy. That’s not to say I won’t be around at all, but I need to get back to posting because I want to, not because I feel I should.
I need to figure out what’s important to me, because I’m not entirely sure right now. Surely I’m not the only 28 (very nearly 29) year old who still doesn’t know what they want to be when they grow up am I? Will some divine inspiration just come to me….soon? I really hope so, I have this craving to move forward to something, but I just really have no idea what that should be.
Who knows, all this could just be a psychological reaction to living in utter chaos, I certainly feel very uninspired of late, it will be nice to get out of this house, to take a step back from the weeks and weeks of slowing chipping away at a boring to-do list and get back into the real world.
Thanks for sticking with me, it really is lovely to have you around x